Based on the evidence, I don't know why everybody always thought I was so precocious. Unless the other little kids were in really bad shape.
Going through some old folders, I came across a bunch of stories and poems that I wrote in elementary school. Several of them are about Halloween, which I'm sure is no surprise to anyone. I must have been in about...3rd grade? when I wrote the following.
"How the Pumpkin Became Orange
Once pumpkins were all green. But one of the pumpkins fell in a pot of orange dye. It was very becoming, so every pumpkin tried it. And that's the reason all pumpkins are green for awhile and then turn orange."
There you have it! It's a little-known fact that pumpkins turn orange as a fashion statement. They reach a certain age, and then they want to do the equivalent of hennaing their hair. Wouldn't it be a lot easier if we all magically ripened into the most "becoming" colors?