Friday, August 3, 2012

Double Negative Jeopardy

From the newsletter of a local cathedral:

"All visitors who are not of the Roman Catholic faith are welcome to join us in prayer but not to refrain from receiving Holy Communion."

Well, I was going to refrain, because I thought I was supposed to, but then they said I was welcome not to!

I know, I haven't posted in like a million years, and this is what I come back with ... but I was thinking to myself, I need to post ths somewhere! And then I said, gee, if I only had a blog. :)

Not to pick on some poor proofreader over at the diocese. To put it perspective, here's something that was published in our local alternative newspaper yesterday, from whom I could reasonably expect better. It's about a guy who sells and repairs old clocks: "He has such a genuine authority over these clocks that it literally creates an invisible blockade around your psyche that forces us to believe he's been truly perfecting this trade since his days of yore. Then perhaps we'd be as surprised as I was to learn that he's only been doing this for six years."

Where to begin? With how we'd be as surprised as I was? Isn't I part of the we? What does a literal invisible blockade look like? What does it even mean to have a blockade around your psyche? And how would it force anyone to believe anything?

So many questions!